The Nature of Women
Not all women are created equal. And I don't mean that on just the
superficial, physical level. With due respect to all women, everyone
(man or woman) is inherently different, each in his or her own unique
way. However, this book is meant to highlight the nature of women in
particular. It is out of my utmost regard for women and my deep intent
to somehow better understand and relate to you as sensitively as
possible that I have decided to research and write about the observable
facts surrounding your natures.
The content of this chapter is not mere speculation and definitely not
hate-inspired philosophy meant to judge, bash, or criticize women. On
the contrary, it consists of actual observations from both personal
experiences and collective history and scriptures that I hope will be
instrumental in encouraging every man to build deeper, more genuine, and
more respectful relationships not only with his girlfriend or wife but
also with his mother, sister, and daughter.
We can improve our relationships with others by leaps and bounds if we
become encouragers instead of critics.
— Joyce Meyer
My only wish is for you to open-mindedly bear with me and be able to
finish the entire book before forming any premature judgment. I
sincerely apologize for any unintentional mistakes and flaws. Please
pardon my imperfect yet sincere attempt to somehow share with my fellow
men what I have learned about women and how to deal and relate with you.
Again, I wish to emphasize that I have no intent to bash or degrade you.
Instead, I hope to improve what little understanding we might have about
you so that both men and women alike can positively benefit from a
lasting relationship based on mutual understanding, unconditional love,
freedom, and respect.
May this book somehow enlighten you and serve as a helpful guide to
making the important women in your lives feel loved, respected, and
valued. Your words, actions, and general treatment of women will become
one of the most important foundations in keeping your relationships
stronger. This book hopes to make you better role models to other people
looking for relationships or who are in relationships. In turn, the
respect for women will be paid forward to future generations so that
relationships can be sweeter and longer lasting.
It is my sincerest wish for my female readers that, after having read
this book, you will better understand how to find your Mr. Right or how
to be in a position where Mr. Right finds you, how to deal with your man
in a way that he appreciates and respects, and more importantly, what
the duty of a woman is to her man.
Let's begin with understanding the three personalities of women.
The Three Personalities of Women
I've read in ancient Vedic literature that women can be compared to, if
not categorized by, three animal characters. Interestingly, I have found
such comparisons quite sound and close to reality. However, they cannot
and should never categorize or typecast women. Such personalities can
manifest in women singularly or in combinations. Of course, men are not
exempted and can also show such characteristics.
1. The Brave and Noble Tigress
A tigress is generally viewed as fierce and brave yet at the same time
noble and regal. A woman who is like a tigress is equally fierce in her
honesty and frankness, brave in her undertakings, and noble and
committed to any task at hand. She is bold enough to speak her mind,
follow her own will, and tell you outright if and when she is doubtful
of your decision or offended by something you may have unintentionally
said or done. A free spirit, she is neither timid nor an introvert.
A Tigress Is Independent
After mating, the male tiger typically leaves the tigress to fend for
herself through pregnancy and while raising her cubs. She hunts while
she's pregnant and continues to do so after delivery in order to support
her newborns. She also has naturally antiseptic saliva for disinfecting
wounds. Independent and strong-willed, it is her intrinsic nature to
accept life's circumstances as they come.
There are many strong and independent women like this. They continue to
face problems head-on, even after experiencing otherwise demoralizing
life challenges. These women can survive even without the emotional and
physical support of men.
Are You a Tigress?
Did you know that tigers are civilized within their unique
circumstances? When many tigers share a single kill, the males often let
the females and their cubs feast on the carcass first. Fighting over
food is a rare incident with tigers. Instead, they patiently take turns.
So this explains a lot in a relationship. A tigress girlfriend or wife
would fare better if men are more like tigers in certain circumstances.
In other words, a man who shows some chivalry and gentlemanly behavior
may be able to tame the tigress in you and help avoid fights. When there
is a misunderstanding, you, the tigress will want to win the argument,
especially when you know you are right. You want your needs to come
before the man's.
Taming the Tigress
While you are tame and well behaved, you may observe that you are quite
fearless, carefree, and independent in the playground. There's simply no
In order to be tamed, you need adequate space and freedom. You don't
want to feel too confined or controlled. Otherwise, you will rebel.
2. The Gentle Cow
Cows are kind and gentle and have a considerably warm nature. Unless
protecting their young, they never attack other living beings, not even
stubborn flies. They are tolerant, calmly brushing away insects with
their tails and patiently waiting for milkmaids to finish milking. Even
their eyes express the same gentleness and kindness. Studies also show
that they possess an advanced level of intelligence as well as high
emotional sensitivity and complexity. In the company of a cow, a human
feels no apparent threat or endangerment.
The Cow — A Symbol of Women's Motherly Nature
In Vedic culture, cows are treated with high respect because they are
considered mothers. After all, they provide nourishing milk for us, our
children, and our grandchildren. Without milk, we could not enjoy the
healthy benefits of butter, yogurt, cheese, and other products derived
from it. In many parts of India and other Hindu nations, cows are
revered as holy mothers and legally protected. If you kill a cow or act
as an accessory to the murder of one, jail time can reach seven years.
Are You the Gentle Woman?
Women who can be compared to cows are slow and gentle, not only in their
physical movement but also in their behavior, judgment, and decision
making. They are sensitive, smart, kind, patient, understanding, not
easily agitated — even when provoked or angered — and often
sweet, approachable, comfortable to be around, selfless, and loyal.
Unlike the tigress, they are forbearing and don't retaliate unless it's
critically necessary. They also have no inclination to engage in a war
of words with anyone — or any kind of fight, for that matter. They
are softhearted and fragile, and it can truly be heart-wrenching to see
them cry as silent tears roll down their cheeks.
This type of woman is quite a rarity nowadays. She simply enjoys being
at peace and in harmony with herself and everyone around her. She is
admirably simple and practical, clear-headed, honest, and trustworthy,
and never picks a fight.
Sensitivity Is Key to Sweeter Relationships
Women who are cows are silent. Similarly, most men are not talkative
either. In order to make the relationship and household infinitely
better and more peaceful, both parties need to make extra effort in
reading between the lines. Be aware of your partner's body language, or
better yet, speak up when you need to. You may not be the type to start
a fight, and you may want to keep your feelings to yourself, but not
saying what needs to be said can make things more complicated.
Air out your feelings instead of letting negative emotions slowly kill
your relationship. If you sense that something is out of place,
initiating a conversation and asking if something is wrong wouldn't
3. The Clever Fox
Although women are generally depicted as gentle, caring, and
softhearted, they can also be quite cunning. In studying history,
reading scripture, and through personal experiences, I've encountered
women who are very clever. Unlike the tigress, who openly expresses
herself when angry, the fox's mentality and behavior can be tricky and
unpredictable. In other words, you can somehow anticipate if a tigress
is ready to pounce, but you can't easily predict what a clever fox will
do. The following are some examples of women with foxlike behavior.
You probably are familiar with Cleopatra's story. She was the famous
queen and last female pharaoh of ancient Egypt who used her youth,
beauty, and charm to the best of her advantage. She seduced,
manipulated, and dominated powerful men for the sake of power.
Samson, who was a great enemy and threat to the Philistines, fell in
love with Delilah, a Philistine girl. When the Philistine rulers found
out about this, they convinced Delilah to seduce Samson and trick him
into revealing his weakness in exchange for money and, of course, for
the safety of her own people. Samson was ultimately stripped of his
Herculean strength, blinded, and then enslaved.
If you have not heard of Wu Zetian before, she was the only
empress of China. She started as a teenage concubine and later married
the emperor. After her husband's death, she became empress, advocating
the elevation of women's social status. She is considered to be the most
loved ruler of her time, and her rule filled China with peace and
The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
Being clever and smart is an admirable trait in women. However, being
sly and manipulative is a totally different thing. I have high respect
for women who display quick wit and intelligence, using these to
encourage and uplift other people. However, I do have major
reservations, doubts, and yes, even fear of women who use their prowess
for self-centered reasons.
It can be pretty scary to come across such women who abuse their beauty,
charm, and power. To my female readers, please don't be offended and do
try to be as objective as possible. In fact, perhaps you have even
observed this behavior in yourself. It's not just in the movies or books
when sly women wreak havoc in the household and in society. It's surreal
yet very real.
How to Deal
If you think you have a tendency to be quite manipulative, my only
advice is to be extra vigilant. Of course, don't turn a blind eye to
your flaws. It's not only for your sake but also for your man. In the
long run, you might end up hurting your relationship and especially
yourself. You may not be as submissive as the cow or as fierce and
honest as the tigress, but you can be both if you really want to.
To Men and Women
Men, don't typecast all women as sly foxes because they aren't. And
women, please don't typecast all men as chauvinists because not all of
us are. My point is that we're not static rocks or emotionless robots.
Our differences, which will always be there, are what make us unique.
There's really no point in bickering and pointing fingers at each other.
In a relationship, sometimes men are at fault, and sometimes women are.
What we can try to do, if we're truly sincere in a relationship, is show
respect, understanding, and unconditional love for the sake of peace and
harmony. Being more understanding and tolerant of each other's
weaknesses and boosting each other's strengths, plus lots of respect and
love create a more peaceful, happy, and lasting relationship.
Every woman has her personal preferences when it comes to Mr. Right.
Some would do whatever it takes to get their Mr. Right, right in the
palm of their hands. Some would do whatever it takes to capture their
Mr. Right. And yes! They would go beyond extreme limits to get him.
Many of you have heard of the saying "beauty comes from within." But
let's face it; the very first thing you notice in a person is how he or
she looks. This is the initial step of getting that person attracted to
you. Although, to get the right man for you, you need to take care of
yourself. This becomes so engraved in some women that they make quite an
investment in how they look.
Needless to say, to attract Mr. Right, many women spend so much on
beauty products that will enhance whatever they have. From a man's
perspective, this is not a bad thing because we want our women to always
look good. However, to find the right man, some women tend to do some
ridiculous things to get noticed.
A lot of women spend so much time reflecting on the clothes they want to
wear and the look they want to achieve. They spend a lot of time in
front of the mirror, fitting in all the clothes they have to their
satisfaction. Some would even go beyond the limits just to be updated
with the latest fashion trend.
Some women also go through extreme diets and exercise just to achieve
the perfect body that has been engraved in everyone's mind. In a few
extreme cases, women turn to surgeries, diet pills, Spanx, corsets,
detoxes, and any quick fix or new fad to get their desired bodies. This
does not undermine the fact that they can have adverse reactions from
doing some of these things, just to attract the ultimate man of their
But do they really get the right man for themselves? I highly doubt it.
Women may be going through these extreme efforts, but superficial things
do not go a long way.
Who Is Mr. Right for You?
Generally, there's a certain type of man that a woman wants. A woman
looks for certain qualities that have been engraved in her since
childhood while looking at her dad and other influences. There may be
several ideal types of men, but it is important to make sure that you
are suitable for him as well.
1. The Romantic Man
When a man constantly brings you flowers and chocolates and does
gestures that make you feel appreciated, he is showing the
characteristics of a romantic man. He still keeps the faith of classical
romance. A romantic man will look you in the eye and let you know his
thoughts. Typically, a woman wants to be acknowledged and appreciated,
and a romantic man makes this happen. A romantic man uses intimate
gestures to show affection, and as a benefit, you can return the favor
by showing him your own romantic impulses.
2. The Self-Assured Man
He is totally confident and secure about himself. A self-assured man can
be socially assertive and has a semblance of power and control. He knows
his status in a relationship and doesn't feel threatened by other men in
a woman's life. A self-assured man doesn't chase for a woman's approval
and encourages a woman to feel more confident about herself.
3. The Intelligent Man
The intelligent man initiates intellect-provoking conversations and
actively listens to her reply. He can easily make her laugh with his
clever sense of humor and exceptional ability to make boring topics seem
interesting. The intelligent man may physically change with age, but a
woman will be kept interested all throughout the relationship.
Intellectual connection plays a vital role in the relationship.
4. The Creative Man
This type of man uses his adroit hands and creative mind to woo a woman.
This makes a woman feel special and unique, especially if she is seen as
the source of inspiration. Ordinarily, a woman may be fascinated by the
way he mixes her into his art. A creative man is instinctive and
5. The Rebellious Man
The rebellious man has a carefree attitude and does not worry about the
consequences of his actions. He has a bad-boy image that a woman wants
to tame and manage, although she might be futile in her efforts.
Your Definition of a Good Man Depends on Your Criteria
A good man is not hard to find. Whether you want someone who gives you
anything you want, someone who will be good to your children, someone
who contributes his fair share, or someone who is mentally or physically
fit. It all depends on your criteria and your view of a good man.
Generally, an ideal man can't be hard to find if he possesses the
certain characteristics that make a good man. A man has to have
something that makes a woman feel secure and happy with the
relationship. And on the part of the woman, she must also be able to
contribute something to the relationship and not depend so much on the
man himself. She must also be able to provide assistance and comfort to
the man to make the relationship strong.
Excerpted from "Miss Right for Mr. Right" by Lee Speights. Copyright © 2013 by Lee Speights. Excerpted by permission. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher. Excerpts are provided solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.