MISSY THE FELINE FEASTRESS
"You're not Mother Hubbard - you can't sit in my cupboard."
My Mum says that every single day before breakfast - and lunch - and tea - and even before my midnight snack.
It's possibly my one and only fault. I get so excited and impatient when it's time to eat, so I try to tell her. I 'miaow' sweetly a few times, slowly getting louder and louder, until I sound more like "mmmrrreeeeEEEEEEEOWWWWW!". I sit in front of the two Pantry doors and look as sad and hungry as I can. When Mum weakens and opens the barriers to my Paradise, there just inside the door is my Personal Pantry of cat biscuits, and I nick in quick.
I can see all those delicious munchies through the clear sides of the tall container they live in.
And joy oh joy… there's a whole new packet tucked in just behind. Where does Mum find them?
I can't read the writing, and that's also why I walk into Mum's pantry. I keep trying, but so far it's just the smell from inside the box that tells me it's my box. Then it's most definitely time to rub my face against my bikky container, and the box, just to make sure everyone knows they belong to me. You just have to do that often if you're a cat… time and time again. There's no such thing as TOO many rubs – not for a truly fabulous feline.
I guess there are some who would say this showed a fairly appalling lack of dinner manners, but I try my very best to follow good etiquette practices at mealtimes. Truly I do. I eat gently and don't spill anything (oh well… maybe the odd small biscuit escapes, but not too often).
Unlike the DOG outside, the one called Muffin, who gulps everything down so fast she often nearly chokes. Even her tastiest treaties, like bones and the fatty bits off meat and stuff like that, just go down the hatch as if they were her last meal. Sometimes my Mum gets cross, because Muffin nearly takes her fingers too.
Hmm-mm-m. No class - but that's a dog for you.
Now take a cat… well-ll, not this cat. (As if I would leave MY Mum and Dad anytime soon…. or EVER?). We cats know a thing or two about food, and how to treasure each mouthful. We are dainty, delicate – to the Manor born, you could say.
You do know, I'm sure, that we were worshipped and adored by ancient peoples, as being God-like, and having vast mysterious powers. Nothing much has changed really. Just look at how the average family treats its favourite feline son or daughter – quite like visiting Royalty, actually. And then, hidden behind those meltingly beautiful eyes, and beneath that soft and silky coat, lies the heart of a lion, the power of a panther, the timing of a tiger, the courage of a cougar. We cats stalk our prey with the fabulous ferocity of all felines – great and small.
Excerpted from "Tall Tales from the Small Folk Clan (Small Folk Tales 6) [Kindle Edition]" by Christine Larsen. Copyright © 2013 by Christine Larsen. Excerpted by permission. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher. Excerpts are provided solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.
Christine is - a wife, mother, grandmother, and writer. In a past life she has been – a Secretary, Lifeline telephone counsellor, Community Careworker – and a farmer throughout each of these. Today Christine is a born-again writer after countless rejections of her children’s stories over three decades ago. Between financially stretched times and 'busyness' raising kids, milking cows and farming, no space was left to believe in herself as a wordsmith. Her works were tucked away on a back shelf to gather much dust, until a series of unexpected events coincided with her ‘empty nest’ syndrome. At first Christine embraced a variety of crafting pursuits – and then gathered her courage and had another ‘go’ at writing. Success came with recognition and acceptance by Squidoo and Ezine Articles. Both platforms considered her words also worthy of praise and awards – reinvigorating her developing positive feelings sufficiently to embark upon an e-book self-publishing learning curve with Amazon’s Kindle. At last, Christine is celebrating the wonderful and unimagined results of her most passionate dreams and beliefs – like the power of words to teach small minds to never ever stop enquiring and learning about this vast and beautiful world of ours. If her words can influence and lead small folk to fully embrace this basic principle, Christine believes a greater degree of understanding, appreciation, tolerance and acceptance will be born and grow within each small heart. She is SO proud to be a small part of this.
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