Uncle Shelby's ABZ Book: A Primer for Adults Only

Uncle Shelby's ABZ Book: A Primer for Adults Only

by Shel Silverstein

ISBN: 9780671211486

Publisher Touchstone

Published in Humor & Entertainment, Reference

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Sample Chapter

Chapter 1

A is for apple

See the nice green apple.
How many nice green apples can you eat?
Make a circle around the number of nice green little apples you ate today.
1 2 3 4 7 12 26 38 57 83 91 116

B is for baby

See the baby
The baby is fat
The baby is pink
The baby can cry
The baby can laugh
See the baby play
Play, baby, play.
Pretty, pretty, baby.
Mommy loves the baby more than she loves you.

Z is for zoo

Let's go to the zoo
See all the animals!
The animals are locked inside the cages.
Poor animals!
Who will let them out???

See the elephant in the zoo. Give the nice elephant some peanut shells with pepper inside. That will be a good joke on him. Ha. Ha. Ha Ha. The elephant is mad but don't worry -- By tomorrow the elephant will have forgotten all about it.

Poor hippopotomus. The hippopotumos has a bone stuck in his throat and can't get it out. Poor hipopothomus the hipopottomos has no fingers like you do. Poor hipotopomus. Say, maybe he is not a real hiptopomos after all. Maybe he is really a royal prince that has been turned into a hipopotomos by a wicked witch and when some person takes the bone out of his throat the spell will be broken and he will turn back into a prince again and give whoever did it a million dollars in gold and a horse and a castle.

See the hippopotimus in the zoo


Copyright © 1961 by Shel Silverstein


Excerpted from "Uncle Shelby's ABZ Book: A Primer for Adults Only" by Shel Silverstein. Copyright © 1985 by Shel Silverstein. Excerpted by permission. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher. Excerpts are provided solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.
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